Looking Beyond “Out There”

When you were growing up did you ever use one of these with your parents; “Thanks for putting me to bed early,” “You grounded me,” “You took away my toys, my car, my stereo, “It’s not fair,” “The reason I hit my brother/sister is that they hit me first,”  “The teacher gave me a bad grade.”  “The teacher put me in detention or in-school-suspension,” “The cop gave me a ticket.”  “The boss fired me.”  “The coach kicked me off the team,“ or the ever popular “Everybody else was doing it, it was peer pressure!” Have you ever observed adults using similar excuses such as “The boss reprimanded me,” “The reason I’ll never get ahead in life is because of_____,“ “Why be nice to others when they are not nice to me,” ”So what if it’s not ethical, everybody else is doing it, it’s the only way to get ahead” or “It wasn’t my fault, they were doing it to.” I have had it!  I am so sick of this “blame it on others,” mentality I could just scream!  I want this mentality to change and change fast.  And I don’t want you or me to lose our cool trying to get it accomplished.  But, bottom line, I think it’s time for us to step up to the plate and confront this mentality head on. If you really think about it, most people think the CAUSE of their problems is something “out there.” They think other people, situations or things CAUSE them stress, frustration, pain and problems. Thinking this way directs most people to act in an attempt to change or manipulate “out there” to get what they want in order to feel good. You can see their focus isn’t on how they’re choosing to think. It’s focused on “out there” and that’s a setup for frustration. If “out there” doesn’t change enough, most people feel bad. Either way, many people allow “out there” to have enormous power over how they think, act and feel. Thinking this way will result in them “reacting” to the world around them. 

POWER QUESTIONS

  • What could you relate to in this paragraph?
  • How does thinking this way hold us back?
  • What is one change you are going to make as a result of reading this?